EeZee Alphabet

Starting to study shorthand can sometimes be hampered when you are having to think only of the sound of the word, and not the longhand spelling. English spelling is notoriously irregular and unphonetic, and so I think that most of us long ago had to leave behind any notion* of being able to write consistently phonetically. Then we found that for shorthand it was necessary to recapture that frame of mind. I found this hindrance faded quickly and painlessly, and, having got past the first chapter, writing by sound very soon became second nature. I shed no tear that this lovely new shorthand did not match the spelling, indeed it formed its own world where spoken words became logical and orderly shorthand outlines.

Quirky Qwerty

The poor old quirky and irrational longhand was left out in the cold. I never had any difficulty with ordinary longhand spelling, as I always took an interest in writing and English, but for fast writing it is out of the question. Those who are not willing or able to study any shorthand might have to make do with using alphabetic letters for whole words, which is easy to do, as evidenced by texting “shorthand”. But as the texting repertoire expands, the memory load becomes ever greater, until it resembles a code that both writer and reader must agree on and memorise in order to communicate.

* Insert the vowel in "notion" so that it does not look like the short form "information"

OICAB,CUAB?YSICAB2

The names of most alphabetic letters more or less resemble whole words and I thought you would be amused* to read the following items from the Internet Archive book “Stenography: A Monthly Journal Devoted to the Interests of the Shorthand Profession (1886)”*. The writer of the verse seems to have taken on a negative attitude which is most certainly of no use in his shorthand writing endeavours, but then he will have found this out by now! The poem requires the American Zee pronunciation and the H sound omitted from “he”. The second passage looks to me* like a gentle-humoured parody aimed at the vogue for phonetic spelling reform, and plays upon the strange appearance that results when the letters used are not the familiar ones. Instead of trumpeting the advantages, it is instead an entire apology to its readers. This rather reminds me of those inventive or garbled shorthand outlines that occur in haste when one cannot think of the correct one, and which, despite not being in the textbook or dictionary, nevertheless often remain quite readable in spite of their unfamiliarity.

* amused/amazed - always insert the 2nd vowel sign in these and their derivatives

* http://archive.org/details/stenographyamon00bealgoog pages 83 & 88

* me - inserting vowel sign is helpful in phrases, where it might be misread as "him"

Correction to JPG below: the first dot of the heading should be on the line

THE FARMER'S* LIFE

The farmer leads no E Z life, // The C D sows will rot,

And when at E V rests from strife, // His bosom will A K lot.

In D D has to struggle hard // To E K living out,

If I C frosts do not retard // His crops, there'll* be a drought.

The hired L P has to pay // Are awful A Z too;

They C K rest when he's away, // Nor any work will do.

Both N Z cannot make to meet, // And then for A D takes,

Some boarders, who so R T eat, // That E no money makes.

Of little U C finds this life, // Sick in old A G lies,

The debts he O Z leaves his wife, // And then in P C dies.

* Distinguishing outlines for farmer/framer & former/firmer, see
http://www.long-live-pitmans-shorthand.org.uk/distinguishing-outlines-list2.htm

* there'll - insert the intervening circle vowel, otherwise it would read as "there will", see http://www.long-live-pitmans-shorthand.org.uk/phrasing7-misc.htm#contractedapostrophe

A WAIL FROM THE WILD WEST – THE TYPE PHOUNDER'S PHAULT

We begin the publication of the Roccay Mountain Cyclone with some phew diphphiculties in the way. The type phounders phrom whom we bought our outphit phor this printing ophphice phailed to supply us with any ephs or cays, and it will be phour or phive weex bephore we can get any*. The mistaque was not phound out till a day or two ago. We have ordered the missing letters, and will have to get along without them till they come. We don’t lique the loox ov this variety ov spelling any better than our readers, but mistax will happen in the best regulated phamilies, and iph the ph’s and c’s and x’s and q’s hold out we shall ceep (sound the c hard) the Cyclone whirling aphter a phashion till the sorts arrive. It is no joque to us – it’s a serious aphphair. (691 words)

* any - this short form is also "in" and as the context here does not help, it is best to insert the final vowel sign for clarity.

Key to paras 3 & 4, for the purpose of word searching:

THE FARMER'S LIFE
The farmer leads no EASY life, the SEED HE sows will rot, and when at EVE HE rests from strife, his bosom will ACHE A lot. InDEED HE has to struggle hard to EKE A living out, if ICY frosts do not retard his crops, there'll be a drought. The hired HELP HE has to pay are awful LAZY too; they SEEK A rest when he's away, nor any work will do. Both ENDS HE cannot make to meet, and then for AID HE takes, some boarders, who so HEARTY eat, that HE no money makes. Of little USE HE finds this life, sick in old AGE HE lies, the debts he OWES HE leaves his wife, and then in PEACE HE dies.

A WAIL FROM THE WILD WEST - THE TYPE FOUNDER'S FAULT
We begin the publication of the Rocky Mountain Cyclone with some few difficulties in the way. The type founders from whom we bought our outfit for this printing office failed to supply us with any f’s or k’s, and it will be four or five weeks before we can get any. The mistake was not found out till a day or two ago. We have ordered the missing letters, and will have to get along without them till they come. We don’t like the looks of this variety of spelling any better than our readers, but mistakes will happen in the best regulated families, and if the p-h’s and c’s and x’s and q’s hold out we shall keep (sound the c hard) the Cyclone whirling after a fashion till the sorts arrive. It is no joke to us – it’s a serious affair.